


Used to be mine

by Alpha_Camolot



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Magic Revealed, Merlin has music talent too, Music, Pining Merlin (Merlin), Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 06:04:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15679488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alpha_Camolot/pseuds/Alpha_Camolot
Summary: People of all over, regardless of class or station, have gathered in Camelot for one of its biggest celebrations. With it comes great food, stories, and of course-music. Now, Master Rowland is looking for a soloist, a special voice, who will receive fame and riches through all the five kingdoms. Doesn't sound to good to Merlin, even though he has no intention of auditioning. Too bad the choice is taken out of his hands.





	Used to be mine

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Hisa_Ai](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hisa_Ai/gifts).



> *Le Gasp* I know, right? Probably thought you'd never see my username again, yet here I am. With another work I'm going to promise to try to finish, and probably never will. You guys knows the drill. But who knows, just maybe. I'm trying to get on lionheart libraries tumblr tag.   
> This is inspired loosely by pianos are made for falling by Fishwrites and Harmony by Smcstrav, cause honestly, I'm a sucker for Merlin has musical talent fics, and there are not enough. I've probably stressed this before somewhere. Ah, well. The title is from the musical, waitress. I'm almost done with chapter two, but here's ch.1 for you guys. I'm rambling now (I wish I could do this when actually writing the chapters). Anyway, enjoy! ^-^

Merlin caressed the lid of the piano. Night had long since fell, and the music room was bathed in moonlight. A large room, filled with instruments of every kind. There was a door on each end. One which was closer to the library, and physician's tower. The other closer to the throne room. Merlin stared out of one of the high overhead windows, letting the gentle beams of light wash over him. His heart was heavy. Heavier than it had been in a while. All because of his stupid crush on a prince he could never love. Who had been flounced from princess to princess during the welcoming ball this evening. Drinking wine, and forcing a laugh through a tight smile. Who had drunkenly cried himself to sleep at dusk about being a ‘meat trophy’, and unable to do a thing about it. Other than cling to his manservant, who’s heart broke for him. Who would have to pretend tomorrow that it never happened so his beloved prince could save face. Who would have to pretend he hadn’t wished for just a moment, to be one of the princesses Arthur’s attention had landed on. What he wouldn’t give for Arthur to look at him like he wasn’t the most precious thing in the world, instead of his idiot servant. Merlin sat down at the piano, and lifted the hard wooden cover over the keys. Tentatively, Merlin reached out his fingers and played a few chords. The mellow key perfectly matching his mood. He played a bit louder, and let the notes reverberate through the room. It felt so good to be able to play again. Music was a talent that Merlin did not indulge himself in often. He  _ loved _ to watch the performances that took place in the great hall. When it came to his own talent, however, it was better left hidden. Will had once jokingly commented that Merlin was nearly as good with music as his magic. His mother had offhandedly agreed, before looking stricken. If soldiers wouldn’t carry off her powerful, warlock son, they would take her prodigal, musical one. So, like his magic, Merlin kept it hidden, though not unpracticed. He sang with the villa in the brooks, and the centaurs taught him how to play every bard’s instrument, and then some. If Merlin hadn’t decided on being a physician, he certainly could have made a fine traveling performer. Not that anyone in Camelot knew this. Part of the whole, you know, secret thing. Merlin seemed to be finding himself with a lot of secrets now. He thought back to his golden prince, who by now was sleep, and wrapped up in his thick blankets. Experience with joining on overnight hunting trips let Merlin know that Arthur snored, just a tiny bit, and had a tenancy to drool. The only time he could be less than perfect. More, human. Merlin’s heart twanged again. Merlin had written a song, which was suppose to be about him, but somehow turned into being about Arthur. It always led back to Arthur. Merlin began singing the words, which he held so far from the surface. 

“ **_He isn’t perfect, but he tries._ **

**_He is good, but he lies._ **

**_He is hard on himself._ **

**_He is broken and won’t ask for help._ **

**_He is messy, but he’s kind._ **

**_He is lonely, most of the time._ **

**_He’s all of this mixed up, and baked in a beautiful pie._ **

**_He used to be mine_ ** .”

Merlin felt tears well in his eyes, but he pressed on. Every note, every movement, was him. This was the one thing he would never be hated for. And he would be damned if he cut himself off. He hadn’t been this honest with himself in a very, very long time. Merlin’s voice vibrated in the room. Mixing and tingling with the piano. Rising higher and higher, in volume and strength. Echoing every pain in his chest, and flooding the room. Merlin’s fingers danced along the keys. Quick strokes that played such a melody of regret, the stars wept. Merlin’s heart broke as he thought of Arthur in the flower garden with Princess Mereila, and he bled his heartache all over the piano.  _ Arthur. _ Merlin thought, as he played on, until at last, his grief overcame him. Merlin had to stop playing in order to shove his fists over his mouth in an effort to muffles his sobs. Merlin’s shoulders shook with the effort.  _ Stop it,  _ he commanded himself,  _ STOP!  _ Merlin rose from the piano, closed the lid, and rushed from the room. Unaware, of the presence behind the other door. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Well, that was that. What'd you guys think?
> 
> this is what I listened to, on repeat, while writing this chapter  
> https://youtu.be/D3rdQ6P5hQ8


End file.
